


Reclusive Attention

by hikik_omori



Series: reverse kagepro [1]
Category: Kagerou Project, Mekakucity Actors
Genre: i started writing this like. Months ago i only have the first part done, im sorry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-12-13
Updated: 2019-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-08 02:01:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,175
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21780331
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hikik_omori/pseuds/hikik_omori
Summary: The Eyes Which Captivate.
Series: reverse kagepro [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1569640
Kudos: 12





	Reclusive Attention

Shintaro hates when people look at him and whisper.

Shintaro hates when people open their mouths and say "Hey, Kisaragi-kun, can you help me with my homework?"

And he hates when Ayano Tateyama comes up to him shyly and smiles brightly. He hates when Ayano sits down next to him and gets every question wrong. He refuses to help her out though, because she's like everyone else.

That's what he had thought, at least. Everyday after she finally says "Hi, Kisaragi-kun! Lemme just, ahaha, sit next to you VERY friendly-like!" (usually she just said "Good morning! Care to help me out?" and got ignored), she gives him a new paper crane made of his tests. He doesn't know how to feel about that- does she just go trash diving? Is that her thing? It sure seemed like it.

He thought that would be all, but _no_. "Kisaragi-kun! C'mon, I can't go alone!" He ended up being dragged to a concert against his will because the person the other ticket was for 'couldn't come'. He would have protested more if he had an actual life, but he couldn't come up with any excuse. It was well known that he had no friends aside from Ayano.

He surprises himself with that. Ayano Tateyama.. is his friend? It doesn't seem real. She's just an annoying peer who acts like she is. He realizes after a while that Ayano is really pretty, and the red scarf is glaring and yet symbolic. It reflects her because it's bright and the first thing you notice when you look at her.

Later, he starts making songs for Ayano. Consider it.. his own paper cranes. He doesn't ever dare share them with his friend, though. That would wait.

Right now, however, he hates that he's the one who can't stop staring. It's honestly ironic. Uncharacteristically, he opens his mouth to speak first. "Tateyama," she blinked and looked at him confused. "Uh, do you want to study with me after school?" He hates the pause he made as he spoke, but now Ayano looks absolutely delighted and she nods eagerly.

"Of course, Kisaragi-kun. Are we gonna hit the books or what?" He's fallen in love with an idiot, perfect. Of course his taste in girls is the dumb brunette. He rolls his eyes, and the rest of the day goes by the same. Like usual. However, this time, at the end.. He's waiting. He scans the crowd for a likely flustered girl with a red scarf and beaming smile.

He doesn't see her. Shintaro freezes at this, but remembers.. Ayano is stupid like any other person who wasn't himself. Likely, she's gotten herself lost. He sighs and moves to glance into his bag. He'd written song lyrics earlier, and hoped it hadn't possibly fallen out.

That's when he hears a gasp. Whirling around, she is there. Smiling at him like she hadn't caused him a scare, she grabs his hand. She.. grabbed.. his hand? It didn't make sense to him. Sure, he might have phrased the invitation odd (he wasn't sure- he didn't usually ask people to study with him, mostly because he didn't study) but this was a little too intimate.

They're both blushing. The two had briefly discussed where to study, and decided on Shintaro's place. Ayano called her family to let them know, then they were off. Shintaro forces Ayano to let go of his hand, it was getting awkward. Everyone was looking at them. He hates the feeling of eyes burning into his back.

He always feels it. "This is so frustrating.." He sighs to himself. His companion looks at him curiously. "Ah, uh.. Not this, I mean, augh!" He sweats nervously, then takes Ayano's hand back. "You know, maybe we should hurry!" The eyes intensify, as if sensing his refusal to endure it a second longer.

Ayano gasps when Shintaro runs, pulling her with him. Of course, the boy isn't a great runner and after they reach his house, he clumsily opens the door. Running took a lot of strength out of him, which made sense.

"Shintaro!" Ayano said his name in such a worried tone- Hey, wait, his first name? "Is this your little sister? Aww, she's such a cutie!" She giggled, patting Momo's head.

"Oniichan, you didn't tell me you had a girlfriend!" Momo gasps, making Shintaro glare at her. Though, it held little force. He knew his sister was only kidding around, though this was embarrassing..

"She's just a friend from school." He sighed, making Ayano smile. He didn't understand why she was smiling though, but then again.. Did this girl ever quit her smiling?

"You said it! I'm a friend!"

He's going to slap her.

That day, they study. Ayano's starting to figure it out, and so the day ends with Ayano going home and thanking him profusely for helping her.

"I'll see you tomorrow, Kisaragi-kun!"

It's over, and so another day comes.

"Ahhh, Kisaragi-kun!" Ayano is late, a piece of toast in her mouth as she juggles holding her books and a pencase in two hands. "Ahaha, I'm so stupid-! EE!!" The books fall onto the ground, and Shintaro sighs as he gets up to help her.

The teacher watches, absolutely dumbfounded. Should she be giving a detention? This was certainly some entrance.. The day passes on regularly, though.

They walk home together again, but Ayano's clutching his hand like it's a lifeline. She looks sad. Shintaro.. is confused. "I'm sorry, Shintaro." She mumbles, making everything just that much more worrying. but he hates it. He hates that she's apologizing for quite literally, nothing.

Why?

Why?

Why?

Why is this _idiotic _girl apologizing to him?

"Listen, um, I know you don't like lots of changes.." What? She's right, but what? "But, uhm, I'm, I'm really sorry!" Ayano tugs onto her scarf, looking at the ground with a soft frown. She stands on one foot for a moment, then the other foot. She's done this before, when she's really nervous and scared. What is it?

"Spit it out, for what!?" Why? "Quit it, Tateyama-san, beating around the bush is so stupid!" He yanks his hand out of hers. This is really making no sense whatsoever. Why can't he see an answer to this bizarre and sudden and unwelcome change?! He can also feel the burning, _burning_, **_burning _**gazes of so many other people. He hates this more than anything else.

"What happens after this! That's.. that's what I'm apologizing for, ok? But, but um.."

That has so much foreboding in it that Shintaro wants to yell and scream. For what? For _what_?!

"I enjoyed my friendship with you."

The day ends with that. Shintaro doesn't know how to respond, the world turns upside down. What does she mean? He goes home, feeling like he's in a daze. He knows what she means, he knows exactly what she means.

Shintaro knows he wouldn't be able to stop her.

When he comes to school that day, she's dead. Fell off the rooftop.

He quits going to school.


End file.
